Room
4673
By: FeDaTa
“They had the right love, the
right person and the right faith but they had it in the wrong place at a wrong
time. Their love was pure and amazing but everybody would think that it wouldn’t
last a lifetime. It was all about bad timing that their love can’t be
fulfilled. And that bad timing all happened at Room 4673.”
I am Helen Grace De Vera, a simple girl with
simple a dream and that dream is to be happy. My dream seems simple but I was really
wishing for it since then and I could really tell that I am different from the
rest with the blank expression plastered on my face and these cold-looking eyes
that pierces through one’s soul. There’s still one thing that’s different with
me from the rest and that is the fact that I am dying. I’ve been diagnosed with
leukemia and it is on its last stage, stage 4. And this is the main reason why
I can’t be happy since happiness has no room in my life since I have the sharp
knife of a short life that’s ready to stab me at the back in no time.
I’ve been here in this hospital for God knows
when and what makes it worst is the fact that I only had 10 more days to live
but it could be changed when I undergo a bone marrow transplant immediately.
But I doubt that I’ll live since they can’t found a donor that would donate his
or her bone marrow to me. I lost hope and stopped believing a long time ago so
I wished that goes with my parents and friends as well, I just wished they’d
give up on me. But they won’t stop at all, and that scene continuously breaks
my heart all the time, so I choose to live in this hospital alone. I hate
seeing them breaking while seeing me like this.
I
wanted to live more and make them happy. But I can’t fight like hell with them
since I already accepted the fact that I’ll die 10 days from now. But I did
wish for some divine intervention that saves me from this sad fate of mine. If
only someone could save and give me the little piece of hope to live. If only
that someone comes up to me and tell me to live, live for him.
My
thoughts were interrupted when the doctors and nurses entered her room. I
thought that they were inside to conduct examinations for me, which is odd
since they’ve already done tests the other day. But then I got surprised when
the nurses come in with bed sheets and blanket in hand, then I realized that it
was meant for the other hospital bed. So I thought about another patient whom
has the same fate as mine will occupy the other bed. I watched them as they fix
the bed, when I heard voices outside of the room and I assume that it was the
patient. I was expecting that through our illnesses, we could get along well
since it’s been a long time since I had a friend. Since that friend of mine
before got cured and moved on with her life. Then the moment of truth came, I
hear quick footsteps and I heard the slowly moving of the door. But I was
shocked to see the patient who’ll occupy the other bed, he’s a young guy in
which I presume who has the same age as mine who looks perfectly fine. I was
confused as to why the guy has been admitted in here when he looks healthy but
one thing is for sure, he’s a rich lad who’s given much care and attention so I
assumed that he’s here since he’s having little problems with his health. I
lost my interest in knowing the guy more, since I think I was out of his league
and it seemed like we won’t get along since he looks like a really happy kid
with those sweet smile and those glowing eyes. While I watch the new guy, I
didn’t realize that I was looking at him for a long time already and I only
realize for a minute when the guy had caught my stares and that made me
embarrassed. But what had shocked me is when I realize that he’s smiling widely
and was about to come near my bed. But out of nowhere, I saw myself hurriedly
pulling the curtain that separates my bed from him. And I just heard his sigh
and laugh at what I did. Without any reason, I just found myself smiling with
the thought of him sighing as if he’s disappointed over not having the chance
to talk to me. I just realize that it was great to have someone here with me
since I’ve been lonely this whole time and I think of what I had in mind a
minute ago, could it be him, the guy one whom I wished to save me and who’ll
give me that piece of hope? No, it couldn’t be him, it was impossible that God
had granted my wish if I only wished for it today. I erased the impossible
thought in mind and just lied down my bed facing the curtain that separates his
bed with mine while feeling sleepy. While I was in my way to dreamland, I saw
how the guy slowly pulls the curtain away and saw him smile. So that made me
think, he had opened up the closed curtain, could he open my closed heart and
mind too? Could he enter the door to my life? Is he the one whom I’ve been
waiting for?
Two
days has passed and everything seemed like the way it was before, except the
fact that the guy is still in here with me. I thought earlier that he had left
already but I was shocked when I saw him enter the room with a doctor with his
side a minute ago. So I was thinking what could have been his illness that he’s
still in here. I am curious but I am too timid to talk with him so I got
contented with looking at him while he’s in his bed fidgeting through his
phone. I was about to go out of the room when something caught my attention. “Hi,
would you mind if I sit in here along the window? I was just asking for
permission since it is part of your place.” asked by the guy. I was caught
off-guard and I couldn’t talk immediately but unknowingly I shake my head as a
response that I don’t mind if he’ll sit there since we’re sharing a room so
that area is not mine alone. I saw him smile widely and saw him get something
under his bed, his guitar. Before he sat down the chair, he turned at me and
said thank you. And with that one thank you, I felt my heart pound hard and I
saw myself looking intently at him as he starts strumming his guitar and as I
felt my heart pound harder I just looked at the floor as he play. But what made
my heart pound hard is when he started singing. “I don’t know you, but I want you,
all the more for that. Words fall through me and always fool me and I can’t
react. And games that never amount to more than they’re meant will play themselves
out. Take this sinking boat and point it home, we still got time. Raise your
hopeful voice, you have a choice, you’ve make it now. Falling slowly, eyes that
know me and I can’t go back. Moods that take me and erase me, and I’m painted
black.” And there he stopped playing right at those lyrics; I felt
every line that he sang as if it was meant for me, as if he knew me so well. As
he stopped strumming, I wanted badly to look at his face so I slowly lift my
face but I was dumbfounded when I saw him staring intently at me. I felt
drowned with his stare and I felt tears started streaming down my face. And as
I cry, he stood up and come near me. He lovingly wipes my tears away and told
something, “It’s time to stop crying now, I’m already here and I won’t leave.”
Although I didn’t know why he said that, I felt secured and his hand felt
comfortable as if I knew him since long time ago. That time, everything was put
into a halt while we’re staring lovingly at each other and I hope time stops
all the time, so that I won’t lose this guy even if I don’t know him.
Since that day I found myself getting more
attached with him and I felt like I already found the guy whom had given me the
last shot of living and fighting with my leukemia. But despite the will he had
given me, I was left with only 6 days before I die and I still haven’t had news
about a possible donor. I was about to give up every minute but when he smile
at me, all of my doubts go away. And I tend to feel happier now since he never
left my side just like he promised that day. I woke up this morning and
yesterday as well, seeing him looking at me. And just like the typical reaction
when caught, he always blush and smiles which looks too cute and that makes me
pinch his cheeks lovingly. Like the usual routine, I went to the sink to brush
my teeth but unlike before he’s here by my side happily brushing as well. He
even prepared our breakfast not like he had cooked it personally, but he set it
on the table when the nurse gave it to us. He played his guitar again this day
with the same song while smiling and looking at me, while I take pictures for
memories. We were so comfortable with our set-up and I felt for a second that
we have our own world. And I hope this day won’t end. It’s a simple yet meaningful
day for me since he’s still here with me.
Here
we are still in this room sitting side by side with each other just like every
other day but the problem is the fact that I only have 5 days to live and I
haven’t told him yet, just like how he’s not telling me his name. I asked for
it since that day but he never told me his name so I tried sneaking out on the
counter and asked the nurse in there, but she smiled at me and told me telling
it was not allowed. I knew that he’ll tell the nurse not to tell. But despite
that I didn’t hesitate to get close with him since it felt nice being with him.
I don’t need his name to feel happy with him or sit here with him. I can be
with him even he has or he doesn’t have a name. I am contented seeing his face,
hearing his laughs, listening to his jokes and talking, his surprises and sweet
acts, listening at him play his guitar and I am contented with this moment
here, with him. Although he told me that he’ll say his name someday and he told
me that he’ll say it in a special way for a special girl which is me. But with
that idea, I felt sad since I did think that I won’t have a chance to know his
name since I know death is waiting for me.
I
am sitting alone in this room at 7 am since I had a terrible dream about us.
And in that dream we were riding a bus when the bus crashed into a big truck
which made the bus lose its control and it hit the railings of the bridge. He
told me to get up and leave the bus but I insisted him to go as well but he
won’t budge and as I checked on him, I saw his leg stucked and bleeding at that
time. He told me to leave but I cried and begged. Until I lose his grip on him
and got pushed out of the bus and I saw the bus fell down to the vast sea. It
was a really bad dream and I don’t feel good with it, so I quickly checked on
him. But I saw him nowhere in the room. Is it a sign that he left already? Is
everything a lie? I can’t die alone, I don’t want to die alone, I don’t want to
die anymore but what could I do if my only hope left too? What should I do
while waiting for the remaining 4 days that I’ll live?
I
only have 3 days more to live and I am all alone in this gloomy room. I haven’t
eaten yesterday and I am only laying on my bed which makes the doctors
horrified and in panic. Since acting like this could make me condition worst.
They even called my family to stay with me immediately but I remain
emotionless. I am dying and that can’t be change anymore so why bother. I hated
the scene where I see my loved ones cry so I left them at the room crying since
I don’t expect to live anymore. As I walk down the hall, I pass by two nurses
gossiping about a patient who’s in a coma and how pitiful the guy looks. I was
about to go somewhere when I heard from the nurse that the guy was from Room
4673, my room no, our room. Without any hesitation, I head to the ICU to confirm
everything. And there I saw him lying on that bed with all those apparatus
connected to him and that scary sound from that machine. I am glad that I saw
him again but I didn’t expect that I’ll see him in this state. I thought all
along that he’s fine so why is he in here? As I stood there and cry, I felt
someone’s presence near me. A tall looking guy who has swollen eyes that looks
like it comes from crying and that same look I see on that guy’s face. Could it
be his dad?
“What
do you need, young lady? Do you perhaps know my son Troy?” asked by his dad. So
his name is Troy, what a lovely name and it suits him well. I wished I knew it
from the start. “I am his special friend who stays with the same room, Room
4673.” I told him truthfully except the fact that I am only his friend. “You
must be her.” he told me as he smile genuinely. “Her? What does that mean?” I
asked confuse of what he had told. “You’re the girl who’s dying. Sorry about
the word but that’s what he told me. He’s been admitted here since last year since
he has heart problems and was about to end his life since he can’t accept that
he’s sick. But then when he saw you crying in that alley near the hospital,
crying and shouting while blaming the Almighty of everything especially your
sufferings and that sight made him stop and think about what he’s planning to
do. He’s planning to kill himself while there you are crying since you are
dying. He erased that plan from his mind and stopped right there and he looked
over you till you head back to the hospital. He wanted to give you happiness
and he begged his doctor to transfer him in Room 4673. But his doctor told him
he can’t since the room is already full. So he waited for his time and he got
it now. He’s in there now with you and I know he’s happy that he has a chance
to be with you even in a short period of time. I hope he made you happy and
that memories remain even if he dies.” told by his father with gloomy eyes and
I was shocked with what he had said. “He’s dying?” I asked him with a hint of
pain in my voice. He looked at me with teary eyes and nodded. “He’s looking for
a heart donor since last year but we can’t found one. I’ve search everywhere
and I’ve even went to several hospitals but I can’t find one. That’s the reason
why he ought to kill himself since he wants the pain to stop for me and for
him. He badly wanted to live before but he badly wanted to live more now for
you, his love. And that made me more desperate to find a donor for him.” told
by his father while crying painfully. I turned my back at his father and walk
as if I didn’t hear anything but I turned for the last time at him. “He made me
happy and he gave me hope when I almost lose it. I wasn’t love widely but he
loved me deeply as if I’m the only person who deserves to be loved. He loved me
so much but he did not tell me not even once, maybe this is the reason why. I
can’t let the man I love die like this, I’ll find a way to make him live. And
I’ll do that even if I need to give up everything. Please, take care of him
while I’m away.” she told and smiled at him as she walked away leaving his dad
in awe.
After
2 days, Troy, the guy whom loved Helen, just woke up from coma after the
successful operation he’s been through. He’s eager to go at Room 4673 since he
misses and wishes to see Helen so much after being unconscious for the past few
days. But to his surprise, the doctors and his father stopped him from visiting
Room 4673 since they told him he’s not well yet but he’s hard-headed and had
made his way to their room. But when he reached their room, he felt his heart
broken by the scene of Helen’s funeral held in their room just like Helen Grace
wants. As he comes closer to her coffin, all eyes are fixed on him hinting pity
on the guy. When he saw her smiling face on that glass, his tears started
streaming down his face. Her mother hugged him and told him not to cry or mourn
since she’s alive inside him, her heart beats continuously for her and it won’t
stop unless he dies. He was too shocked knowing what she did for him. Questions
filled him as to why Helen did what she did and all her mom did was to tell him
that she loved him deeply too that’s why she died for him.
He
who gave her hope back then was given another chance to live, but that goes
with the fact that he shall live without her. But that won’t erase the fact
that Helen was Troy’s and that will remain forever along the memories inside
Room 4673 or Room Hope.
